More Fun or Just More Approachable?
Posted on December 6, 2007 - Filed Under Got Me Thinking
My natural hair color is brunette. I love being a brunette.
But once, when I was younger, I wanted to see if it was true that blondes had more fun. So I did it - I went out and bought myself a bottle of blonde and some bleach. Don’t worry, Melsie - I had a hairdresser friend who warned me to get a drabber so I wouldn’t end up with a brassy carrot top.
I was going to do it right if I was going to do it - so this was going to be a two-step job. I had to bleach all the color out of my almost-black hair first. Then when I put the blonde color on, I used that drabber to tone down the red highlights of my natural hair color. I also did my eyebrows so they wouldn’t look too out of place under the blonde bangs. I think I ended up doing a decent job. Thanks to the drabber, I didn’t end up looking like some cheap bimbo. Even my mom thought the color looked natural. At work, a lot of people told me I looked like Loni Anderson (now, mind you, this was back when I was a younger, even hotter version of myself, so it could be a little true). 
Now the funny thing was that I knew three different men who I was interested in dating at the time. I never had dated more than one person at a time. I didn’t know how you could do such a thing - it seemed unfair to not give all your attention to the one person. But, we had just moved away from the town I grew up in and I wouldn’t be young and carefree forever, so even my mom suggested I date more than one person, have some fun, and not be so serious. So I thought I’d give that a shot. The trouble is, none of the guys I was interested in would ask me out. We’d spend time together and they’d flirt and stuff but no more than that. They seemed just as interested in me as I was in them, so I couldn’t understand it. Finally, I gave up on the lot of them and figured I’d start fresh. And I went blonde. Wouldn’t you know, the three guys I had been interested in ALL asked me out then.
So was it the blonde that finally got them to move forward or did they all just happen to start feeling comfortable at the same time? I’ve often wondered about this.
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Well, as a new blonde.. LOL I went a couple of weeks ago and had the red pulled out and am now 100% blonde. She did my eyebrows too LOL I love it. I think a lot of it is that you feel more confident, more sexy. I mean think about it, blondes are the “perfect” image we are given. So it only stand to reason that we feel that we are more attractive with blonde hair. I really do this its a self confidence thing. Everyone wants to be around someone who feels good about themselves, right?
Yeah, I wonder if that is what it really came down to, Calamity. The self confidence thing probably had a lot to do with it.
I am thinking the old adage, blondes have more fun might have some truth to it.
I personally wouldn’t know though!
Say, aren’t you blonde, Kami?
I think it’s just you looked like loni anderson.
I had almost forgot about her…what was that raido show on TV? WKRP? ha ha ha
LOL. Maybe THAT was it! Yes, WKRP in Cincinnati. Now don’t go making me feel all old because I remember it.
Blondes do have more fun! My natural hair color is a mousy blondish brown. It’s yuck. I’ve always had blonde highlights to brighten it up. But last winter my hairdresser dyed my hair a dark auburn. It was beautifully sophisticated. I always wanted to have like a chestnut color. The drastic change was kinda nice, a lot of people didn’t recognize me. That was kinda cool. But the drak hair made me feel like I had to be more grown up and responsible. I love that I can bounce back and forth between quite dark and nearly platinum blonde, but blondes have a lot more fun!
Sorry about the long comment. I gotta run and get that meme done you tagged me for!
Yes, you are very lucky you can bounce back and forth like that between colors. Not everyone can. I actually don’t think I remember having more fun as a blonde, just having more choices since the guys seemed more open, but there were also just a lot more losers to choose from. I do think that feeling free was fun though. Just saying to heck with it all.
But that feeling is what made me go blonde so now it is hard to tell. LOL
[…] Teeni’s post about blondes having more fun, reminded me that I hadnt updated you all on my hair.. And just for the record, the answer is Heck Yeah! […]
Hey Teeni,
I always wanted to be a brunette (being a blonde) and tried it several times. I never looked like the sexy sultry brunette I wanted to be though, just sort of pale and slightly alien. Maybe I needed some of that drabber you mentioned?
In terms of the three guys? I think it is twofold - 1) the blonde thing probably got their attention because it was such a change and 2) The minute you decide you aren’t interested in a guy, nothing makes them come running faster.
Annie
I think you have some really good points there, Annie. Wow, you guys are really thinking. I like #2 though - that seems to be the case lots of times. LOL
Oh, blonde’s definitely have more fun. I should know!
Do you think being blonde caused you to act differently? lol
Actually that’s a good question. I don’t think so but now that I see Annie’s comment above I wonder if that was it. Maybe the “I didn’t care anymore” attitude caused them to wake up and smell the coffee? Hmmm. Interesting.
Good question … as a brunette (and proud of it!!!) I really can’t say, as I’ve never been blonde or even attemptd to go blonde. I’ve had “sun-kissed” hair which was lighter than normal and had blonde “bits”, but never fully blonde.
I think blondes get more attention, and for that reason the saying probably holds true … at least a little.
You’re probably right Hannah. But sometimes I think I have the most fun of all. So maybe the few gray hairs I earned are actually worth a whole head full of blonde?
Well first of all I would hope that a guy wouldn’t judge me by my hair color but,they just might.As a fellow blonde,(no, i didnt dye it.have never in my life.)i won’t answer that question with the particular answer I have in my head.
Hmm, well you know how some men are. They believe the stereotypes. You were the same person your hair color was the only thing that changed, right?
Nice story…
I don’t think I could have more fun if I tried especially before I had my daughter. I’m definitely not blond and never wanted to be, lol. I have fun now but I had a different type of fun back in the day. You don’t need blond hair to have a lot of men asking you out and no I wasn’t paying them either!
Yes, I think they might have wanted to believe the stereotypes but maybe that is why I’m not with any of them anymore. And you are right. You don’t need to have a certain color hair to have a lot of men ask you out and you sure don’t need it to have fun.
Interesting post! I can well believe the fellows acted like that when you became blond. Men are VERY visually influenced (and most are incredibly gullible and competitive…not to be scorning them but it just came to mind..lol)
YES they ALSO believe the stereotypes as Opal said…
What did you do?
(I am red headed, and wonder WHAT men think of redheads?)
I never hAVE gotten an answer, but H prefers me to be a lighter redhead so I high light it..
Good question, Merri. I dated all of them and quickly eliminated two of them. The last one I went out with for a long time. I think red heads have a stereotype of having fiery tempers but I had one man describe to me his idea woman would be a strawberry blonde. I think it is a rarer color and I do think a lot of gentleman like it. But I think that might be a good question to pose on a future post. I’d be interested in what kind of response there was from the men too. The gentleman I mentioned just now ended up marrying a brunette so I think people have ideas of what they’d like but that doesn’t mean they end up falling in love with what they think they would.
My ideal of what I like is….
Someone that is at my beck and call and refers to me as “the goddess”.
Well, I don’t think that is going to happen all the time.
I’m lucky that I get the goddess treatment all the time. And so is everyone else. Because believe me, if the Teeni isn’t happy, then NObody’s happy.
I think it is a little of their perception and the way you act. I probably don’t have the average male viewpoint or maybe I do and I’m just in the minority in admitting it. I think if the guy in question is just looking to fool around and isn’t interested in having a relationship, then looks are everything and there is probably a large population that gravitate towards blondes (my guess without talking to you about this is the two you discarded might have fit into this category). I found that in looking for a relationship, looks might make a first impression and while it doesn’t hurt long term, personality is much more important. I’ve met people who on first impression I was attracted to, but once I got to know, didn’t feel attracted to anymore and vice versa.
On the other hand, I have seen you go through a lot of transformations and they change how you feel about yourself a lot more than the way I feel about you. I think this then changes your self-confidence and in turn how you act around others. Bottom line is you don’t change because your appearance does and I’ll love you more than anything even if you had green hair.
Awwww. I can’t believe today I logged in so late when this was here for me. Thank you honey. I love you so much!!! And even though you’d still love me with green hair, I don’t think I’d go that far. Maybe purple or hot pink though. I like those.
:: grin grin ::
I deffinatly got more compliments when I had blue and purple hair. I think that was mostly the “holy crap colored hair! but… it’s not spiked! and… she’s taking care of small children?’
XDD
It looked like mermaid hair… and made my face REALLY pale… so I liked it XD
You do have very fair skin. And I know you have fun changing haircolors. I think you are a very pretty girl in all of them, but I have seen a lot and to be totally honest, I think you are a knockout with pale blonde hair. That’s just my opinion. But I think you get more compliments on the blue and purple because it is more unusual and because you are brave enough to try a radical change like that. I just love you anyway so even if you looked like Cousin Itt, I’d still think you were cute.
Fortunately you don’t look like Cousin Itt though. Well, only from the back. heehee.
When I first visited the tearoom and read about TGH I thought that stood for THE GOOD HUSBAND. Even though I have since discovered your interpretation of TGH, I would suggest another appropriate definition …TRULY GREAT HUSBAND
Oh, you definitely said it, bjbs. I am blessed in some areas and that is definitely one of them! My hubby is my favoritest person in the whole world even if he is a techno geek and sometimes BECAUSE he is a techno geek in addition to being the smartest man I’ve ever met.
Hah! I dont know, Teeni. Have you thought of going back to blonde? Maybe you should .. like a little experiment :]
I’m a natural blonde *like you couldnt tell!* but I get more attention as a redhead.
Wow - I DIDN’T know you were a natural blonde, Ms. Red. I just thought you were a hot chick.
Since I’m not a natural blonde though it would be hard to keep up with, roots and all that, so I never really thought about going back because of the maintenance. But I haven’t ruled it completely out either.
I have to agree with TGH. If a man is looking for a relationship - his attention will be caught by something about looks, personality stokes the fire, and then chemistry gets things going.
Physical changes can cause people to act differently. Frequently people will make an outward change to reflect an inward change they have been working on. When they make that physical change it is kind of a signal that they can start behaving in a new manner.
Ok after that last paragraph /hippie = off
BTW - My wife is 5′10″ a redhead and is pretty saucy. She kickboxed for quite a while and is pretty formidable. I joke that the only reason she married me is because I have broader shoulders and I am bigger than she is.
Wow - Thomas let the hippie out. LOL. But it really is great to get another man’s opinion. It really is good to hear that less emphasis is placed on looks and more on personality. I also tend to agree with you that people will make an outward change to reflect an inward change, although I had never thought much about it before you put it into words for me, Thomas. Oh, and Thomas, I bet she married you because you respect her as a person first, a woman second, and helped make her feel good about herself. Plus you know she woulda kicked your butt.
Hey Teeni,
not blonde anymore… not even close. More of a mousy dingy brown that thanks to modern chemical technology no one has to witness!
I was only blonde as a kid and well, that adage just doesn’t hold true for that age. Thanks goodness!
Yeah, ALL kids should have fun anyway - regardless of hair color or even whether they have hair.
Gosh Teeni,
now I feel badly stereotyping men after reading your husband’s comment ..what a sweetheart!
TGH COULD stand for truly great husband indeed!
YES I have often had that thrown at me about redheads having fiery tempers..
H will say, “yes it’s true about me,” but I demur..lol
stereotypes!
TGH will probably tell you I have a fiery temper as well. I wonder if it is because we are a little more free with our tempers around our significant others than we are with the general public? I mean, my husband sees sides of me that nobody else does. So I wonder. And yes, TGH could stand for Truly Great Husband and I think I will have to go and change my definition now.
I apologize for all the happy faces but I couldn’t help putting them in whenever I was talking about TGH after that comment he wrote.
There I go again. 
teeni - You will get a kick out of the story of how my wife and I met My Wife and a Side of Cheesecake.
Having a women you just meet give you cheesecake, a full body hug, and presses her chest against you leaves quite an impression
Well, THAT definitely got my attention! **grabs coat and dashes off to see Thomas’ post**
Awww, what a sweet comment from TGH!!
That comment really makes him look good, huh? But you know, he really IS that good.
I am all choked up after TGH’s comments.
My husband is like that. I talk about things I want to change and he is like…well, if you would like to do that and it will make you feel better, fine. I may struggle because of my health and often feel I look terrible because of it but he loves me for what I am and not what I look like.
I wuv you too and I’ve never seen you! LOL
I went blond once and man did I look horrible. I looked like some deranged ghost. Yuck. I didn’t have my natural hair color for about ten years. I kept switching between auburn and black.
Brown is fine and all but so ordinary and meek. As an artist, I wanted something more bold and daring
BTW - From what I know about you, I would never describe you as meek - I think you are one of the most bold and daring-est people I know.
I can picture you, my delightfully demented friend, as being one who would wear well those funky dark blues and purple haircolors. Somehow I think you could pull those off, kinda like the character on your banner at your blog. Funny thing about going blonde for me was it looked okay on me but I think that the shade you choose makes a big difference. Some people would have to go platinum and others would have to have a honey gold color - all depends on skin tone to make it look right. Well, I’m no hairdresser but that is my take on it.
Ahh… Hmm. Well, my natural hair color is medium-dark ash brown, and in the summertime I’ll have reddish highlights throughout the sides and top (as a teenager, my mom accused me of using peroxide!) Years back I had chunky blonde highlights for the first time ever, and it was fun for a while. I really enjoyed the change. Since I was already married, I had no experience in how that new hair color would have affected dating and whatnot but my husband thought it was really cool looking. I also recall that I received more verbal compliments from other women than from men. Once the highlights grew out, it was back to my natural color.
Fast forward several more years, I experimented with a spectrum of shades that I either mixed myself or used straight…I even went a few steps below platinum for a stretch (and yes, I definitely had to lighten up my brows for that one). Out of every color I’d worn, I believe the natural looking lighter shades suited me best. My hair being so dark, I feel like it closes me up, casts a shadow across my face and suffocates my inner self too much, and inhibits me somehow. Whenever my hair was long enough, I’d almost always pin it back away from my face….so I could see myself. I suppose along the lines of what someone else mentioned in an earlier comment about the change in hair color and the change in how you act…I can relate to that. The lighter hair shades “opened me up” so to speak.
These days I don’t dabble much in hair dyes, but now whenever I buzz my hair and can see my face clearly I feel brighter, happier and more free… Plus, it seems I attract more people with a shaved head, even little old grandmas give me compliments (maybe some of it has to do with how I carry myself as well as the shock of almost “no” hair). So, I guess (for me!) a shaved head is the new blonde
Wow. This was an awesome comment, Blaqberry! I can totally understand the pinning the hair back and being able to see your own face. I like to be able to see the face of the person I’m talking to as well. If I had some good thick hair, I’d keep mine very short as well (I love those spiky dos), but it is very fine so even my stubble was kind of sporadic. Not very attractive. LOL. I love that you buzz your hair and I keep thinking of a phrase in my head after reading your comment. The phrase is that you are “putting your best face forward.” Neat.
I’ve been a redhead all my life, until a couple of months ago, when I decided to see what I’d look like as a blonde.
My hair is now light blonde with tons of very light highlights. It’s pretty. I have very fair skin. With the blonde hair I look fine, and it looks particularly great in natural light, but I really still feel like a redhead inside. The blonde hair strikes me as being more approachable and easier for most people to relate to than the red. The red is much more dramatic; it is theatrical and striking. The blonde is less dramatic though pretty. I always got attention as a redhead and in fact got more attention than my blonde friends. Now as a blonde, I do notice that people seem to feel I’m easier to approach. Maybe I looked too intense as a redhead, I don’t know.
I don’t think that I’m having more fun! But, blonde is by far a more common color than red, at least amongst those women who dye, and it seems to be easier for people to identify with. I’ll go back to red sometime this year, but it’s an interesting experiment being this blonde. I’m enjoying it, but still feel red at heart.
It’s interesting that you say you still feel like a redhead at heart. I guess an outward change doesn’t really mean that you have fundamentally changed on the inside. Great comment! Oh, and welcome to the Vaguetarian Tea Room, My2Siamese. Nice to have you!